working through the changes of my body and soul


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John's Journey
danae whispering
Letters to an Angel
According to Amber
Descent into the Dungeon




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Sunday, January 09, 2005

me on top!!

posted by L | 6:34 PM

wow. i’m a . . . switch!

it’s official, now, is what i mean. John and I were asked by a new friend to scene with him at our monthly play party, with us both topping, and i did it!! as it turned out, John let me do 95% of it, with him guiding, assisting, and observing. the bottom is male, and very inexperienced as far as play (his assessment), but was wanting to play with us, so we talked and negotiated and discussed, and in the end it was a clear YES from both of us. :)

we used the cross at the party, strung him up, and started, with the intention of the scene being very light, both because he hasn’t played much, and because it was my first time really topping someone.

and can i just say right now . . . i felt FABULOUS afterward. and i felt like i have a hell of a lot to learn, which isn’t a bad thing, but is a little daunting.

the bottom said he really enjoyed it, there were none of the many implements that were used on him that he hated, though the wooden spoon came close (which i totally understand, it’s pretty intense). he did not seem to go very deep, which is good, again because i am such a novice. John worked a little with the floggers, and i found myself fondest of the various slapping devices, because at this point i felt i had the most control with them, and could deliver good contacts with them without fear of wraparound or wild hits in general. but, i also used a couple of floggers, and i can see how they will be favorites soon.

i also used a wartenburg wheel, curry combs, a metal-toothed comb, and i started with these really awesome simple garden gloves that have rubber nibs all over them that do a superb job of bringing the sensation level up slowly but surely. the bottom said, “those are really interesting” about ten times, so i think he liked them the best. i also clothespinned his nipples, as he had said he can take quite a lot on his nipples; by the bodily reaction, i think he liked that pretty well, too. :)

in light of my high feeling, John suggested we not play ourselves that evening, which made sense to me as well (even though i always want to play), so we simply made sure the bottom was okay (with the glow in his cheeks, i surely think he was), and sat around and talked about the scene some more with him, and socialized some more with our party group.

by the time we decided to leave, i was still feeling very glowy myself, but could definitely feel the beginning of a return to normal, so the timing was good.

and when we got home, John said “what do you want to do now?” i said “play”, and then said “even though i know you’re maybe not in full form” or something to that effect, as it was pretty late by then, but he said even if he couldn’t manage a full-fledged scene, he was more than willing to treat me to a spanking. and this was after he told me how proud he was of my performance with the bottom, which i think meant more than any of the feelings i was having myself.

and wow do i love it when he spanks me. he has the most intense ability with his hands . . . mmmmm.


so all in all, this has been a pretty darned fabulous weekend. he woke me this morning with more spankings, and darn if my behind isn’t a little stingy just thinking about it!! :)

happy sunday, all, and blessed be.


6:34 PM [permalink] | |

Saturday, January 01, 2005


posted by L | 4:42 PM


they actually shot off fireworks at midnight, just a few short blocks from our front door, and it was AMAZING.

the evening was already special. we had spent the whole day together, gathering special foods for new year’s day (he has this thing with black eyed peas, and i had to have herring), getting the champagne, and of course a little vodka for the breakfast bloody marys (which, actually, we didn’t do, but hey – they’re good for supper, too). in our personal histories, new year’s eve 2003 was auspicious because we both had events happen that we feel put us in line to meet when we did, so we had talked of that some, and just reveled in the complete and total love we feel for each other, and how utterly amazing it is to us that anyone could be this happy.

we were watching a movie, and suddenly realized it was 11:55, so we paused it, opened the champagne, and watched the clock . . . then linked arms and sipped from the flutes, just about as perfectly romantic a moment as one could imagine. and then suddenly, BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! we stepped out on to the porch to see what was up, and in the western sky there were fireworks! they were so close we could feel the concussive boom as they exploded, and they were SO beautiful. the nite was incredibly warm, at least 55 gorgeous degrees, and we stood on the porch and held hands and just kinda felt like the fireworks were just for us.

and if not for the cheering we heard all around us, they might have been. but i’m glad that others could enjoy them, too, cuz they were SO great.

this year has been pretty damned incredible, and i just want to say once again how thankful i am for John. we had a lovely and peaceful Yule, and i was apparently a VERY good girl, as he showered me with gifts as well as love. i did my part for him, too, and we spent the day just enjoying not getting dressed or going anywhere (much like today!), and talking to family (mine are some distance away) and long-distance friends on the phone to share the joy.

this morning, i realized that now that the holiday season is over, it’s actually going to sort of get normal around here. this is good, mostly, especially because it means some regular posting from my corner. it’s been crazy lately, and John’s work schedule has been rather odd, but i realized today that instead of feeling restless while waiting for him to come home, i could actually use some of those hours much more productively than cleaning or watching tv. as in, i could POST!! wow, what an idea.

so, the weekly posts should actually become weekly again, and i hope that as i continue to share our lives with y’all, you will continue to find the bits interesting, and continue to offer me perspectives that i haven’t considered when the big stuff comes around, too.

i thank the entire pantheon for this life, the rewards already reaped, and the ones to come from now on. most especially, i thank them for bringing John into my life, and for the fireworks that i see every day i’m with him.

many blessings to you all, and wishes for a most peaceful new year.

blessed be,

4:42 PM [permalink] | |